Thursday, August 25, 2005

The Broken Lull

After 5 days of festive and fun national holidays, the hard-hitting journalists of the K.C.N.A get back to work doing what they do best...

U.S.-S. Korea Joint Military Exercises under Fire
We're under attack! I repeat! We're un... oh, It's just the K.C.N.A. Again.

Pyongyang, August 24, 2005 (KCNA) -- The United States and south Korea began Ulji Focus Lens-05 joint military exercises in south Korea on Aug. 22 which will last till Sept. 2. Rodong Sinmun Wednesday observes in a signed commentary: The U.S. is getting itself fully ready for another Korean war Like they should and always do while pushing forward the reorganization and relocation of its forces out or into Iraq? according to the operation plan for the invasion of the DPRK and staging joint military exercises with south Korea and Japan one after another. The on-going saber-rattling is, therefore, a preliminary operation to provoke the Korean war of aggression. YOUR the only ones using the term "Korean war of aggression". Who the fuck are the ones "sabre-rattling", really?
It goes on:Like it always... does.
The exercises are aimed to round off the preparations for a preemptive attack what's that rattle? on the DPRK, ratchet up the situation on the Korean Peninsula to an extreme pitch of tension, hamstring the favorable process of reconciliation and cooperation between the north and the south and pressurize the DPRK by force of arms to meet the unreasonable demands it raised at the six-party talks. I didn't know not possesing nuclear weapons was an "unreasonable" demand...
Should the U.S. persistently escalate its military provocations and war moves against the DPRK, showing no change in its policy of stifling it as now, the prospect of confidence building between Pyongyang and Washington will be remote and the situation will turn more complicated foreshadow.The reality compels the army and people of the DPRK to heighten vigilance against the U.S. sophism that it would "neither attack nor invade the DPRK" and reinforce its determination to bolster its military deterrence in every way.
INCLUDING NUCLEAR WEAPONS!!!
The U.S. bellicose forces should ponder over the serious consequences to be entailed by their madcap military exercises against the DPRK and immediately stop the Ulji Focus Lens-05 joint military exercises that go against peace and dialogue. Kim, have YOU "pondered over the serious consequences" of pissing off George W. Bush? This guy is. Ya fuckin' madcap maniac.

*Snicker* Guess the next story. I'll give ya a hint, It happens more than once a week... which is saying more than the K.C.N.A's news "service".

Gift to Kim Jong Il
Pyongyang, August 24 (KCNA) -- Leader Kim Jong Il was presented with a gift by the General Union of Syrian Peasants. It was conveyed to an official concerned by its executive member who is heading its delegation on a visit to the DPRK.
Was it a cheque for transfered weapons technology rendered?
Another state secret gift, I guess.

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